well a lot has happened since i last posted but i need to get this off my chest before i start sorting photos out for my main post.
it was step FILs birthday on friday and him MIL, SIL AND BIL took R out to bowling and me and the biker were going to meet them after the biker got back from work. we sorted the present and the card and walked up. as soon as we got there i got asked to look for MIL and SIL in the toilets. i found them and it was apparente that SIL was very, very drunk. as it turned out MIL was the only one there who wasnt absolutely pissed.
im so angry. after we got there i was the only one looking out for R and his 3 year old cousin. both kept trying to run off and i was the only one making sure they didnt. what the hell were they doing before we got there? who was looking after the kids?
i have always said i didnt want R around people who are drinking. i remember being scared out of my mind surrounded by drunks when i was a child. i never ever wanted that for R but now its happened. i dont know if he was scared as he wouldnt tell me but i know he noticed the actions of those who were drunk. i wanted to cry the entire time we were there and of course that caused a row with the biker. he doesnt understand why i cant have things like that happen. he had such a good childhood compared to mine. i dont want to use my past as an excuse for anything but it always creeps up on me.
all the biker could see was me in a mood around his family. no matter what i say he wont ever get it.
i hate that R has had this experience at the age of just 4. i had hoped he would never have to
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